*WARNING: this post contains poo.
7:10 am I'm letting the dogs in from their second trip out in the morning, and they run right to their beds where they know to wait for a treat as I'm leaving for work. I put one gate up and go to the kitchen for their treats. They're so cute and smart!
7:11 am I smell something funny but ignore it and finish grabbing my things to head out the door.
7:12 am I look down to give the dogs their treats and see that my fresh, clean, white-as-snow Harry has turned black from his chin down to his front legs...a veritable poo collar (almost like those fake turtlenecks your mom made you wear in the 80s under your sweater...you know, because it was always too hot in Houston to actually wear 2 long-sleeve shirts). What was that I thought about these dogs being cute and smart?!?
7:12:05 am Panic starts to set in.
7:12:10 am Harry is in the sink, my nice clean work shirt is off so it doesn't get dirty, and I'm giving him the fastest bath of his life. I use the hand soap, lather it up, gag every 2 seconds while the poo water is running down my arms and getting stuck in my fingernails. I run to put the paper towels in the trash and find that there is no new trash bag because I forgot to put one in there the night before when I took it out (darn, really wanting to get mad at my out-of-town husband for this one, but I can't this time!). Grab a new trash bag and haplessly throw it in the trash can.
7:18 am I'm washing my hands and arms over and over again at the sink, still gagging a little bit. Find the kitchen cleaner and basically spray the whole bottle over my sink and countertop...no time to wipe it up! Plus, I figure it could use a few hours to kill all the grossness.
7:20 am Out the door on my way to summer school, more panic setting in because it starts in 10 minutes!
7:35 am Walk in the door, pick up my kids, and breathe again.
Needless to say, there are no pictures of this event. Even if I had time to take them, you wouldn't want to see them. It. was. sick.
Sorry if you're gagging now too, but I thought I'd share the pitfalls of doggy ownership. I'm sure I'm not the only one out there with a poo collar story... ;)
Halloween 2012
12 years ago
How does something like this happen?!?! Am I the only one confused? Did Harry roll in it? I'm just so confused! And - WHAT A MESS!! OOH I would be so mad!! :<
ReplyDeleteYou better believe he rolled in it! We had 3 other dogs visiting at our house last weekend, so I'm sure he found some leftovers and just had a grand old time! ;)
ReplyDeleteGreat story...I felt like I was there, yet I am so glad I wasn't!! yuck...poo
ReplyDeleteGlad I was out of town!
ReplyDelete-deadbeat dad
You got MAD SKILLS, girlfriend! Way to go... and not even late. Nice.
ReplyDeletepeter, you were right. while writing this email, i was re-living the stress of it all. hapless does NOT make sense the way i used it. can't quite think of the word i was searching for?
ReplyDeleteOh my! Sounds like some of the situations I've experienced with the girls during the newborn stage. There always seemed to be an exploding diaper when we were in a rush to get out the door. Glad you made it on time.
ReplyDeleteI feel these moments definitely confirm to yourself you are truly a mommy! You are quite the story teller too. I could really feel your stress and nausea! Love it!
ReplyDelete